Never Much Good at Goodbye
by Kilonji
Summary: Ukitake, Yoruichi, and Urahara. Before the fall.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer:** I didn't create Bleach, but I love the characters as if they were my very own.

* * *

This little hole in the wall has not been his haunt for at least a hundred years. In his academy days, lured by Shunsui's promise of an illicit adventure, he'd been drawn and captivated by this place, its shady corners and dusty bar. Many a night he had stumbled home, a few nights been carried there because he'd had such a good time. He was such a faithful denizen of this place that even now, after all this time, the bartender looks and says his name in a friendly way, like he'd only been gone a week and not several centuries. "Table for two, Captain?" And he points to that tiny table in back. Her table.

Where she is sitting, a rare frown on her face. A candle gutters before her and for a moment the amber in her eyes reflects back at him. He can't turn and walk out now, even though he has the urge. He steps through the narrow path created by other patrons who have no idea who he is but are polite enough to make way for him. When he settles himself in the seat across from her, he forces himself to look. And is surprised to see her gazing at the tabletop. "Juu-chan."

"It's been a while. You look well," he says.

"So do you." She still isn't looking at him. Shyness coming from her is completely foreign. In fact, he didn't think it possible.

He is older than her by at least two centuries. He dimly recalls the announcement of her birth all those years ago, long before his days at the academy. His family was noble. As was hers. And births were rare. This is why the Shihouin celebrated the birth of a mere girl. Any baby would do. His parents offered their congratulations to the other family and he was allowed a quick view of the new arrival. She was tiny, dark, and silent in her sleep, as if she knew she was designed for stealth. He reached down, pale fingers grazing soft baby skin. He was interested but not amazed, and after satisfying his tactile curiosity wandered off.

The next time he saw her she was taller. Much taller. And a whole lot noisier. The trees echoed with her obnoxious laughter, mingled with the laughter of her companion. "Ne, Kisuke, that's just mean!"

The twelfth division captain's shoulders were shaking. "Really! Mayuri tries so hard, I can't help but play with him." He looked up to see Juushirou and immediately quieted. Urahara was new to the role of captain. Dignity was obviously something that would have to come later. For now, he would sit cross legged on the ground and tell bad jokes to his friends and not mind the grass stains on his captain's smock.

"Don't be rude, Kisuke," the girl with him said. "Introduce me to your colleague."

"I know who you are, Shihouin Yoruichi. And I know you know me," Juushirou said.

Her smile is brilliant. "So you have me, Ukitake-taichou. It is nice to see your lovely hair up close and personal."

He knew she was not mocking him. Just teasing him a little. All the time he'd spent with Shunsui was worth it. He could flirt with the best of them. "And it's likewise nice to get a good look at your pretty face," he said. "I would have thought the Shihouin heir would be a little more manly."

Yoruichi looked at Kisuke, Kisuke looked at Yoruichi, and both let out a howl of laughter. "Ukitake-taichou," Urahara said, "I must buy you a drink."

It was an innocent enough start.

Kisuke was a genius. And slightly deranged. The drink he promised Ukitake was similar to him: unusual, sharp, and just a little dry. Juushirou settled into a warm fog as Urahara and his companion babbled on at each other, observing their mannerisms with an interest keener than he thought it would be. Listening to them you would think they were twins. They were not so far gone as finishing each other's sentences, but close, and the tales the told him were really just stories they both knew and were recounting to each other for possibly the thousandth time. Kisuke's hands would move with the fluid grace of a Kidou master as he remembered aloud the first hollow he'd killed. Yoruichi's face was a painting that had a million separate thoughts crowded onto it in rapid succession, and her eyes were like living fire. For she was a also a genius, and equally as deranged as Kisuke. "Juu-chan," she laughed, tugging at his sleeve, "are you still with us?"

"I think we lost him where you were spying on that yakuza and fell out of the tree," Urahara grinned.

"I'm still here," Ukitake smiled at him. "The stories you two tell are as good as being there. You shouldn't even still be alive."

The pair looked at each other again. "Yes we should," said Yoruichi with a cool certainty.

"We've come too close to killing each other without even trying _not_ to be indestructible," Kisuke chuckled. "But other than that, Ukitake-taichou, we're both pretty unremarkable. _You're_ old man Yamamoto's prodigy."

If he wasn't flushed already from the booze, he would have blushed. "I had no idea you'd paid any attention to me," Juushirou said.

"How could we not?" Yoruichi yawned. "You're the first of your kind. You've set standards for us to exceed. How can we know we're getting better if no one comes before us?" Kisuke nodded his agreement. Then he turned to her. "Did you just yawn?"

"No," she said.

Urahara stood. "Well it is past one in the morning. We should call it a night."

"You just want to get your sleep in so you can be all shiny and new when you pick up where you left off torturing Mayuri," the Shihouin princess retorted, stretching.

"Of course," Kisuke said, winking at a slowly rising Ukitake. "The job would hardly be worth it without its little perks."

The night air was brisk and, thankfully, sobering. But Juushirou still felt warm. Instead of walking side by side as he thought they would, the pair flanked him. Kisuke walks close, giving him a sly smile. "Thank you for coming out with us, Taichou," he said.

Yoruichi, on the other side, grunted her agreement. "We should do it again. Soon."

Ukitake was about to agree with him when he felt it. A light pressure on his ass. Someone was pinching him. Controlling the urge to jump out of his skin, his head swung to Yoruichi. She gave him a wicked grin and was gone in a flash. Which left Urahara. Instead of apologizing for his companion's apparent wanton behavior, he smirked a little, winked, and disappeared just as quickly.

Walking back to his quarters in the moonlight, he decided not to wonder who the actual perpetrator was until tomorrow.


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Bleach. In fact, I'm dirt poor and sing for my supper. Which explains my diet of tootsie rolls and dandelions.

**A/N:** Yes, the first chapter was terribly slow. But there is method to my madness. The voices in my head have assured me.

* * *

"_Do you remember the next day?" she asks, tracing invisible characters onto the tabletop with her finger. "I'll be you thought you'd never lay eyes on us again after that."_

"_No," he says, "I knew you'd turn up. Both of you. What drove me nuts was which of you would turn up first." He sips his drink and smiles at her slyly. "You had it all planned, didn't you? Both of you."_

"_I'll never tell you our secrets," she grins back._

Tomorrow only turned out to be seven hours away. Apparently, they'd been spotted by one of Shunsui's spies. Juushirou was shocked to find his friend camped out in the open space of his office, sipping sake and tossing teasing words out to the already crimson Kiyone. "So," Kyouraku said, one eyebrow arching mischievously, "you met up with our new twelfth and got the added bonus of the mysterious and lovely commander of the Keigun Brigade. And just why wasn't _I_ invited?" Kiyone bowed silently and made good her escape.

Ukitake rubbed his head. "Sorry. It was a little spur-of-the-moment. I never thought of it."

"My, my." Shunsui scratched his head. "Perhaps you were uninterested in sharing." Juushirou gave him a look. "Fine, then. So what were they like?"

"Feral." The word was on his lips before he really even thought of it. But it was correct. "They're both quite brilliant. You'd like them."

"Are they. . ."

"I can't really tell. They're close, but I couldn't tell you if they're involved." That was half a lie. They were definitely involved. But was it the sort of involvement that led to sex? And if it wasn't, who the hell pinched him? He shook his head of the question. It seemed absurd in the daylight and he didn't want Shunsui to guess. But then Kiyone had returned with a cup of tea for him, and he settled into his breakfast before his imagination could run away with him.

Of course Shunsui fired more questions at him, and he answered most of them as tersely as he could. But when the questions edged more and more towards the physical attributes of the Keigun commander, Ukitake decided his best course of action was to change the subject. Bored and disappointed, the Eighth Division Captain finished his sake and wandered off into the bright spring morning. This was the first time in months Juushirou had been glad to see the back of him. He could not share the experience with him as he had so many others. Firstly, because he had no idea what had happened, but something clearly _had_. Their free and easy way with him was like an open invitation for him and him alone to come and be a spectator—if not a participant—in their strange and wild existence. As he gazed down at he mounting pile of paperwork and his underlings came and went, their distance chaffed him. It was the deference he was owed. He never knew he had been so lonely before. Shunsui's lazy but comforting presence had always been plenty for him.

Secondly, the participation he sensed they wanted from him would probably be more than he could handle. Yes, he was still as weak as he'd been the day he entered the academy. Perhaps weaker. But he had always overcome it when needed. If he took up with those two, he would need to _all the damn time_.

But there was something else. He didn't want to admit it, but something abut Shunsui's comment about not being inclined to share irked him. He didn't know either of them well enough to stake such a claim, but it was true. He knew his reserve. He was more of a listener than a talker. If he brought Shunsui, the laughing man, the insolent joker, the life of the party, in on it now. . .

He shook his head. Didn't he just think to himself he had no claim on them? "You can't loose what isn't yours," he muttered to himself.

And then there was a scraping at the door. He barely heard it, had to listen closely to identify it. When he moved and slid the door open, he noted the lack of wind. Then what was that? He looked down. A black cat perched on his porch, looking around itself before finally gazing up at him with imperious amber eyes. He moved to shoo it away when it limped inside, looked around blearily, and collapsed. Though he liked animals as much as the next person, he never had paid much attention to cats. But to see it laying on his floor, obviously in pain, touched him. "Poor thing," he said to it, kneeling. "Did you get yourself in a scrape?" It mewed a tiny bit, and winced when he took a closer look at the front paw it had favored. It was bleeding a little. The fact that he knew exactly what to do didn't shock him until years later. "Kiyone," Juushirou called out. "Could you bring me a little milk? And send Sentaro for Urahara Kisuke? I think I need a little help."

Urahara took his time, and when he finally arrived, Juushirou knew why. His cool gray eyes had shadows beneath them and his pale yellow hair looked like something with wings had roosted in it. He didn't bother to apologize but instead crouched close to the feline guest. "Well well, what a handsome kitty you are," he crooned at the cat.

Juushirou could swear the cat was looking daggers at him. If Kisuke noticed, he did not make an issue of it. Instead he gently examined the wounded paw. "Looks like a bite. I'll need to clean it out," he said. "I need a warm towel and some rags." when Kiyone returned with the necessary tools, they all stood and watched as he gently rubbed the wound, put a salve on it, and wrapped it. "Is he yours?" he asked Ukitake.

"No, I've never seen it before."

"Well I can take him with me if you like. He's not going to be able to move around properly for a day or so."

"No, that's okay. I'll keep it—er—him here for little while. Thank you for coming," Ukitake said. "Can I offer you some tea?" he looked at Kiyone and Sentaro. Both bowed and left.

Kisuke smiled. "So you know my little secret," he laughed. "Yoruichi was warning me last night I was at my limit. Never could handle alcohol as well as she can."

"Your secret is safe with me," Ukitake smiled back. "Please, sit."

As they settled into the afternoon tea, the cat seemed restless and made his presence known by limping as imperiously as he could up to and settling, limbs tucked under his body, next to Juushirou.

"For a cat you've never seen before, he sure seems to know you," Kisuke commented.

"I know," Ukitake said, hazarding to scratch him between the ears. "Strange."

"You'd better name him. Even if he decides not to stay after he gets better, at least you can call him friend."

"It's only a cat."

"That it is, but you and I are only death gods and we have names, don't we? They say the ancients named things to give themselves power over said things. I think they've got it backwards. Things tell us their names so if we need it, they can lend us their power. Like our soul cutters." The light in Kisuke's eyes was bright and rapturous.

Ukitake laughed. "Some scientist you are," he said. "You're half a mystic."

"Maybe I am," Kisuke smiled.

"I think you are." Juushirou looked over at the cat, who was watching but was clearly disinterested. "Don't you think so, Traveler?"

The cat yawned, stretched and went to sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer:** The only bleach I own was used to wash my Viking Kittens Fear Me T-shirt.

* * *

Traveler turned out to be true to his name. On the second day, sated with milk and warm scraps from the table, he made a point of exploring the thirteenth squad compound, sniffing and rubbing his face on everything that appeared stationary to him. What surprised Ukitake was that he didn't mark any of it in the way Kisuke warned him male cats did. Instead he was satisfied with simply leaving the less permanent feline calling card and moving on about his business. When he was finished, he returned to Ukitake's office and settled himself on the pillow that had been supplied specifically for him. He watched to comings and goings of other people with what seemed like a keen interest. 

When Kisuke stumbled up a little after dusk, however, Traveler sneezed and went to sleep. Kisuke gave him a watery gray eye. "So he's still haunting you, eh?"

"It's like he's always been here," Juushirou chuckled. "Have a seat. What brings you here this fine evening?"

Settling on his haunches, Urahara stretched and yawned. "I put in a longer day than I thought I would, but I'm not tired enough to go back to my quarters." He paused, then lowered his voice a little. "I have too many things rolling in my head and I thought you could help me to sort them out."

"Don't you usually go to Shihouin-san for that?" Juushirou was flattered, but he was also curious.

"I do. . .but only sometimes. Some of my ideas are so far out there that even _she_ wouldn't approve. Some I think might be flat-out illegal and it's best not to talk to the authorities about them in a careless way." Of course it would be all too easy to forget that such a fun loving, laughing creature could be involved in the military, _let alone_ the head of it.

"You don't trust her?" _That_ would certainly be a surprise.

Kisuke's face became painfully serious. "I trust Yoruichi with my life. I just don't want to put her in a bad position. There are just things she's better off not knowing."

"I think I understand how you feel. There were things I thought about while I was at the Academy that I didn't dare tell anyone but Shunsui." Which was true. Ukitake smiled at him reassuringly. "Say anything you want here without fear of judgment."

If he looked closely, Ukitake could detect a slight blush on the younger death god. But it was gone as quickly as it had appeared, and a smile replaced it. "I take you at your word, Juushirou-sama. Yoruichi will be pleased."

Juushirou couldn't help but smile back. "So tell me, what's been in your head today?"

The smile on Kisuke's face became sly. "Well. . ."

Evening passed quickly, with the younger shinigami speaking in hushed and reverent tones about his most recent theories, with the older shinigami interjecting only to ask questions and once and a while offer up an idea of his own. To which the younger shinigami reacted with a delight that was infectious. What seemed to interest Kisuke the most was Juushirou's own ideas about power, its acquisition, its creation. "If there was a way in which a single shinigami, even of limited power, could face a menos without hesitation, wouldn't that be of use to us?" Kisuke ventured.

"That would depend on the means by which that shinigami obtained that power," Juushirou replied. "We have laws just the same as the human world does. What can they be worth if we set them aside for our own convenience?"

"You're starting to sound like Kuchiki. I know it's a matter for Central 46 to suss out, but I'm thinking of what's unthinkable. Suppose the Menos gain sentience. For all we know right now, they are merely killing machines. But if it were possible for them to know themselves, or even be directed by a hand that knew them, they would be the worst threat imaginable, right?"

"I see where you're going, Kisuke-kun. I can't pretend to deny your logic, but it's best not to use a worst-case scenario as an excuse to dabble in something that can ruin you," Juushirou cautioned.

Kisuke sat back, a little crestfallen.

"Now now," Ukitake chided, "if Yoruichi isn't here to sit on you when necessary, the task must fall to me. I'm fairly certain she'd make a rug of me if I encouraged you to do something she wouldn't approve of, am I right?"

"Who wouldn't approve?" demanded the already-tipsy eighth squad captain. The other two men turned to look at him, Urahara with astonishment, Ukitake with warm but annoyed welcome.

"And how long have you been listening, Shunsui?" asked Juushirou with a smile.

"Long enough to ascertain why you weren't interested in sharing, Juu-chan." He stumbled over and flopped down next to Kisuke. "Urahara, my young friend, let's have a drink and you'll tell me what you just told our snowy-haired Taichou."

When Kisuke looked at Ukitake questioningly, the older man smiled. "He's perfectly safe. If he proves to be a danger we'll just sic Shihouin on him."

"Ahh, what a lovely way to be assassinated!" howled the clearly pleased Shunsui.

From his pillow, Traveler stretched, rose, and sat on his haunches. While the three men talked long into the night, his great yellow eyes followed them as if he were listening. When the little group dispersed sometime after three, he left his pillow and followed them to the door. When Ukitake closed the door, he heard an indignant meow. "So, this is it, is it?" The cat stretched and pawed the door lightly. "Well then, we'll say farewell for now, and you just be more careful." He reopened the door and Traveler walked slowly away, following the path that Kisuke had led toward the twelfth division compound. Ukitake watched until he could no longer see the lean black form in the distance. Then he wondered how it happened that of all the beings that had been in and out of his presence in the last few days, this was the one he would somewhat miss.

"_You did not," she laughs._

"_I did," Ukitake replies solemnly. " I had no idea before then how relaxing it is to lay in bed with a cat on your chest, listening to it purr. But as it so happens, Traveler came back the next day. You remember that, don't you?" _

_Yoruichi leans suddenly forward, touching his hand lightly. "It was a good day."_

"_One of the best," he says as their fingers intertwine._


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Bleach. sniff

* * *

"_You were nothing short of magnificent," she says. "I had never seen you fight before that day."_

"_You say that as if you were surprised." He looks at her, the questions already buzzing in his mind. _

"_I was." She tilts her head in the way he remembers she did when she was being devious._

"_You didn't say so then."_

"_Why would I? I wasn't about to sabotage my own plan with something so trivial," she said, winking._

"_So you admit there was a plan."_

"_And it wasn't even Kisuke's." She arches an eyebrow at him, almost daring him to question her further._

_But he doesn't need to. "Kisuke wouldn't have approved."_

"_I knew that," she says, almost sadly. "But you weren't the only one taken by surprise when it started. By the time I stopped to think about what I was doing, it was already too late."_

Special training day at the Academy always followed specific guidelines worked out by the Gotei and Central 46. No students who had not completed their third year could participate. The location was always in the living world, usually an open space with a special ban set about its parameters to keep out any humans. There had only been a few times in several centuries the students had not managed to bring down a hollow; the training space was usually picked specifically because there had been greater than normal activity in the area. The meaning of the lesson was to hone the senses for the hunt, and to sharpen the skills for what happened after the find.

At least three captains and their vice captains were to observe and intervene if it was warranted. This was how the real talent was identified early. Usually the instructors at the Academy would point out those of specific interest, but the captains were allowed to speak privately at a later date with any they wished to admit to their squads early. This year there was only one such standout, a young man of "extraordinary" talent named Shiba Kaien.

Ukitake knew this because he had been told. Twice. Once by Kisuke, who had spoken of Shiba in glowing terms when talk one day had turned to the special training session. "I don't say it only because I am his sempai," he said. "I like Kaien. He's got a way about him."

Juushirou almost snorted into his sake. "I suppose he's got that mischief, too, if he's a friend of yours."

"He does. But the worst of it went to his sister. She managed to get herself kicked out of the academy within two years. She wasn't really suited for the shinigami lifestyle anyway; too much of a hothead. But Kaien is serious about what he wants. He told me the day I met him he was going to be a captain one day, and I don't doubt it."

Juushirou smiled and nodded at him, still a little wary. Any friend of Kisuke was likely to be troublesome. Proof of this was Urahara's best friend, whom Ukitake did not see again until the fourth night after he'd met her. Unlike Kisuke, however, she did not bother to wait to be invited.

He had asked after her, of course. But to invite her to his home, considering her sex and her position, would have been a little bit more complicated than having Kisuke or Kyouraku over for sake and pleasant conversation. Aside from that, she seemed engrossed in her work, so much so that once Kisuke actually lamented her absence.

If Urahara had known where Yoruichi had been, he probably wouldn't have been so easy about it. Even now, settled on the watchtower between Kisuke and the other captain, Aizen Sousuke, Juushirou had to breathe deep to keep from chuckling to himself, even though what had happened shook him to the core. Traveler, who had refused to be left behind, lay purring in his lap. Of course _that cat_ could care less.

Because _that cat_ had decided to become his familiar. And _that cat_ had shared a secret with him.

He had woke in the night. He was a light sleeper. He groped in the dark for Traveler, but remembered that yesterday he'd left. But there was something not right. He knew he'd heard a thud. So what was it? Rising from his mat, he scanned the room for a candle. Then he heard it again, and as it grew louder it changed, from a low hum to garbled words to a steady stream of curses. "Only three days! Oh, hell," the voice seethed, "why now?" The verbiage only got worse (and louder) from there, so loud that he was able to discern where the terrible language was coming from. His frustration overtook him. Muttering a demon spell that emitted light from his hands, he turned the corner that led from his chamber to the hallway.

And nearly knocked down the commander of the Keigun Brigade. As she swayed in the blue half-light, her expression must have matched his, if even for a moment: Shock, and then a flash of horror. And then, impossibly, a growing amusement.

She was completely naked.

The clash of instincts—One said "Look!" Another said "Look away!" And yet another said, "What is she _doing_ here?"—was too much for him. When he caught his breath he coughed. Hard. He blinked and swallowed, but knew it was too late. He glanced up from the crimson hand and found her, still naked, her face etched deep with concern. And then his light winked out. He could feel her reaching for him.

He jerked away. This was complete insanity. _She_ was the one who should be embarrassed, not him. He didn't dare think of how long it had been since he'd been in the presence of a woman in a state of undress. Long enough, but not quite. This wasn't how he'd pictured his next time would be—

He felt the surge of wind. She was gone—but then she was back, with a handkerchief, taking his hand and gently wiping. For all her care, she held his hand tightly. He could not pull away. He settled for cruelty. "Don't you have other concerns?" He could regret the words later.

"Forget the damn clothes," she hissed, finishing up on his hand and leading him back to his chamber. She harried him to his bed, and pushed him back on it. If Shunsui only knew. . . He closed his eyes as he felt her draw his blanket up to his waist. Then he noticed the warmth of her hand on his chest. In the moonlight he could see her face, a mask of concentration. The warmth was sinking deep, not healing, not yet. Exploring. Probing in the way a surgeon would.

"Where did you learn this?" Juushirou managed to sputter.

She shook her head. "Doesn't matter. I can't completely heal you. I can only make you more comfortable." There was a tinge of regret in her voice.

Minutes, maybe hours passed. His reality blurred and shifted, and the only warm spot in the universe had her hands on him. "Don't tell Kisuke," he heard her say. "I'll explain everything in the morning."

She did have a lot to answer for. But all of this seemed trivial. She was Yoruichi, elemental, incapable of capricious deceit. She was also beautiful. "I believe you," he murmured before the world went dark again.

He awoke the next morning to the steady purr of Traveler, who lay still and slept deeply, _her _head nestled into his neck. And he breathed in air as if he'd just surfaced from the deepest pit in the ocean. And did not cough at all. As he sat up the cat did not move. He stared down at her. Then he did the unthinkable. He stroked the smooth black fur, half smiling. And didn't chastise himself when he briefly imagined it was skin and not fur that he was touching. His chest still felt warm where her hand had been.

Even now, wedged between Kisuke and Sousuke who were watching in growing alarm as a phalanx of younger students seemed to be cornered by a hollow. When Aizen moved to go to their aid, Ukitake stopped him. Traveler woke and slid out of his lap, then watched along with the two younger captains as Juushirou leapt down and took care of the hollow himself. In front of the amazed students, he took the beast down with one capable stroke of his soul-cutter, which was not even in shikai. When it was over with, he turned and smiled at the students. One stepped forward. "Captain, that was amazing! Especially your hair." Behind him the rest tittered nervously.

Juushirou smiled. "Shiba Kaien, I presume," he said.

Shiba Kaien almost blushed.

"Shihouin-san told me all about you," Ukitake said. He looked up at the watchtower, where Kisuke was grinning like an idiot and Traveler, settled on her haunches, was gazing down at him. Even from that distance, he could see the smile in her eyes.


	5. Chapter 5

** Disclaimer:** Still don't, and never will, own it.

* * *

In the end, it was the routine that saved Juushirou. He could safely call both Urahara and Shihouin his friends. Close friends, really. All that had happened in the space of a mere five days. Fortunately for him, the tumult gave way to an easy schedule. Several weeks later it was usual for Kiyone to set out tea service at close to seven o'clock in the evening, three cups for three men. And the bottle of sake they consumed without fail every night, talking and laughing until the late hours.

Ukitake Juushirou had become a hub of an intellectual round table. He did not know who advertised it, but it also became normal for others to join in the discussion from time to time. Eventually, every Saturday night was spent at that bar in Rukongai, flanked by Shunsui and Kisuke, discussing anything and everything. Aizen Sousuke had become a regular and often brought subordinates with him. Even the eleventh squad captain, the rarely serious Kurosaki Isshin, turned up more than once. When Yoruichi joined them it never failed to turn into a party. It was almost like being in the Academy again.

Other captains, who used to treat him with awed deference, now were comfortable calling him by his given name and joking with him. Vice-captains and seated officers, whose trust had always been implicit, now gave him their affection as well.

Particularly, he noticed with chagrin, the women. The first and most obvious change was Kiyone. Where there had once been a shy, quiet girl there was suddenly a vivacious, fawning young woman. Her infatuation manifested itself in flattering reports and sudden—sometimes violent—retorts to Sentaro, who had also noticed and could not resist teasing her for it. Ukitake was so flabbergasted by the development that he was at a loss for a solution.

Other women, a few even seated officers, seemed to gravitate to him; he marked a sharp increase in the number of females graduating from the Academy applying for acceptance into his squad. They were skillful, every single one of them, and the one real standout had immediately engaged in an almost unfriendly competition with the shocked Shiba Kaien, who had quickly reached sixth seat. Within weeks, however, they had put their differences aside and faced discipline on one occasion for getting caught in a bad position in the middle of a hunt. Had they not married later, Juushirou was certain the reputation of the thirteenth squad would have never recovered. But the whole thing just made him smile despite himself.

He seemed to be doing that all the time. He didn't notice until Shunsui pointed it out one day over lunch. "You're glowing like a pregnant woman," he had told Juushirou.

"What?" Ukitake nearly inhaled his sake.

Shunsui declined to elaborate, only smiled and clapped his friend on the back. "Whatever it is you're doing differently, don't stop."

Long after Kyouraku was gone, Ukitake mulled it over. He was doing _everything_ differently. But he suspected the newfound glow had nothing to do with his new social status and everything to do with the two whose friendship had brought it about. Brilliant, he had called them. And slightly deranged. Feral. Kisuke was imaginative, open, playful. Yoruichi was adventurous, candid, and—he looked up at her. "No cat form tonight?"

She stretched. "Not tonight. I managed to stay in form for seven days, longer than I have before. I wanted to give it a little rest."

"It's been almost a year since you first started. I'm surprised you're having a hard time with it," he chuckled. He handed her a glass of milk. Her frown became a grin in an instant, and as she quickly drank it, he sat, cross-legged, across from her.

She put down her empty glass. "It's an old skill that's been lost for centuries. I translated the text myself. I haven't breathed a word of it to Kisuke. Haven't you ever struggled trying to lean something by yourself?"

"I have. But I'm not the clever Shihouin Yoruichi."

"Heh. First, I was mysterious. Then I was exasperating. Now I'm clever?" She tilted her head. "How many more adjectives before I get to be _beloved_?"

No matter how much he wanted to, he could not frown at her. He settled for merely not smiling. "Beloved comes a while after _appropriate_."

"Ah. So I take it you enjoy one hundred year courtships."

He had drawn the line early. Partially out of respect for her position, but partially out of sheer, crippling terror. She could end him without a thought. He would be an idiot to even try to keep up with her. He had come to this conclusion without even adding Kisuke to the equation. But she seemed determined to needle him into action, one way or another. His only defense was rhetoric. "I never said I was courting you."

"I know you're not. Why haven't you told me to go away?" She stared him down with hard golden eyes.

"I enjoy your company," Juushirou said. "Besides, you'll get bored eventually anyway."

She closed her eyes and shook her head. "Of all the men in the world, why do I get stuck with the hard cases?"

"You love drama. And you love a challenge. If you wanted a man who would simply roll you, no questions asked, you'd be at Shunsui's right now." He had her, at least tonight. He was completely relaxed. A year of clandestine conversations with her had given him just enough ammunition to keep her at bay. He knew his heart was safe. He had been secure for months now, armed with that knowledge. It dawned on him that it was entertaining watching her try to worm her way out of the traps he laid for her. It was then that he let himself smile at her.

And she, stubborn idiot that she was, could only smile back at him. She made it clear she had accepted the challenge that first night, when he discovered her naked outside his room. He had questioned her the next day; she had answered honestly. When she asked him to remain quiet about it, he did it without hesitation. A secret is a bond. This is the bond that only they shared.

It was easy to simplify it this way, to dance around it the way a moth would dance around a flame. The bond gave them reason enough to see each other alone. The bond made it possible for him to let her to brush and braid his hair on occasion and not think about the implications. The bond created a space in which he could listen to her talk about her work, take delight in her passion, and never once consider whether it was proper that she spent hours in his presence—in the middle of the night, no less—without any kind of chaperon.

In a way it was very much like the conversations he had with Kisuke and Shunsui over sake. He forced himself to recall the similarity when she would let her fingers graze his neck or he would touch her shoulder without meaning to. She was a very close friend.

He spent a good century lying to himself that way. Even though he was glowing with the giddy joy of a smitten man. He carried this joy with him until the end, when Kisuke's inspiration became reality and the world shattered.

"_It wasn't Kisuke's fault," he tells her._

"_It wasn't your fault either," she says._

_They regard each other for a long time in the candlelight._

"_I fought you too hard," he says finally._

_She looks down at the table. He knows she wants to tell him something soothing, comforting. He can't blame her for not having the words. He's been trying to find them himself, and after all this time they're still eluding him, too._


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer:** Kubo Tite and Viz own Bleach.

* * *

"_I never let myself think about how he loved you," he tells her. "But it was worse to think about how I loved him and betrayed him over and over again for you."_

"_It wasn't any better for me," she said. "I knew he loved you and I used that knowledge to spy on him. If I had been more careful with him, maybe I could have stopped him."_

"_You know better than that," Ukitake said, frowning._

"_I do now. We'd spent so much time wrapped up in one another that no one else really existed to us before you. And when we found a real person, what did we do? We tried to cut you in half and share you. We were selfish children."_

The shift came on so gradually, Juushirou would not have noticed had he not been inclined to keep watch. He kept count of the days and months with the routine observation of change and non-change. Trees went from green to pink to gold to nothing; the river just beyond Rukongai flooded as normal and returned to its banks. Shunsui stayed lazy and wise; Kaien evolved and grew mature though no less excitable.

Yoruichi let her hair grow. When they had met the second time, it was cropped close to her neck, thick, dark and soft. Now it cascaded halfway down her back. He knew this because on some nights after she would brush and braid his own ivory locks, she would remove the binding that held her own hair up and shake her head, wordlessly daring him to touch it.

Tempted as he was, Juushirou had leaned the old art of self-denial. Set on that path, he followed it doggedly. The Keigun commander would laugh at his obstinacy and touch his face. His failure to make himself move away from her seeking hands the last time she did this was merely the warning sign of his finally being led astray. The giddy joy in him had turned into something he could no longer name. It prepared to seep out like water from an overflowing basin. He found he was not completely disappointed with his loss of resolve. A thousand times over in his dreams he loved and married a jet black cat. He was prepared to cross the line.

As soon as he knew how to broach the subject with Kisuke. He didn't anticipate rending of flesh and gnashing of teeth from the twelfth division captain. As dramatic as Kisuke could be, there was no jealousy of the amorous kind in him. There was merely that spark of sadness that could spread like wildfire and consume him. Juushirou had seen it once before. When, after years of mind splitting labor, Urahara produced his precious jewel. Or rather, he revealed his creation to his the friend he trusted just enough to be silent about it. Years later, Ukitake would ponder the length of time that existed between the creation and the revelation.

It was one of _those_ secrets. Kisuke would only bring it to him after swearing him to absolute secrecy. Ukitake gave his solemn word and gasped when Kisuke produced the small, glowing object from somewhere on his person.

"All that and you brought it with you?" Ukitake chided, gesturing his guest to sit.

Kisuke's face, for the first time, remained grave. "No one can detect it on me. It has no aura. I've had it for a long time, Ukitake-sama. I've poured everything into it." His eyes were bright and hard. "It's horrible. And beautiful. I should never have—" he stopped, shook his head. "No, I don't regret it. But it must be destroyed."

Juushirou looked at him with growing alarm. "Then this is—"

"Hou Gyoku. It can change hollows to shinigami. And shinigami to hollows." Two short sentences that turned the world inside out. It was like Kisuke, Juushirou thought almost bitterly, to say such a thing so blithely.

"Why would you create such a thing?" The object flicked in Kisuke's hands as if its core had a life and memories of its own. Ukitake shuddered at the possibilities.

"To see if I could," Kisuke said. He was being honest. But his words hid a thousand meanings that all connected and mapped out his nature. A nature which Ukitake admired regardless.

"And now?" Ukitake asked.

Kisuke shook his head. "Old man Yamamoto would call it an abomination. I can't bring myself to disagree with that assessment. It could completely wreck the balance of nature."

Juushirou nodded. "What will you do?"

Urahara gazed at him and it was suddenly clear what state of mind he was in. His hunched shoulders, limp, dull hair clashed with the feverish glow in his usually calm gray eyes.

"Maybe Yoruichi--" Juushirou started.

"No." Kisuke's voice was hoarse now, desperate. "I can't stand the thought of her knowing. My whole life she's defended me. I can fight my own battles and I can fix my own mistakes. I'll find a way without her."

"What if you can't?"

A grim smile forced its way to Kisuke's lips. "I'll improvise."

They sat together in silence for what seemed like hours after that. Juushirou's mind was exploding with worst-case scenarios, but that wasn't what was tearing at his heart. For all Urahara's cold determination to keep Yoruichi clear of it, she already knew. Traveler sat where she had edged close to the twelfth division captain. Her cat-face was impassive but for the gleam in the great yellow eyes. She could not comfort him the way she did when they were children, with a swift cuff to the head and half a hug. Not without exposing herself. And Ukitake.

After Kisuke left, she rose on human feet and allowed Ukitake to cover her with a light blanket he kept for her use.

He wanted to asks her when she had arrived and what had told her to come _just then_. But the first words that came from his lips were far more important. "What will you do?"

She took a breath. "What can I do? He's shut me out." The tone of her voice stank of guilt and grief.

Ukitake would have given anything at that point to hold her, tell her everything would be okay.

But he didn't know if it would be and knew better than to lie to her. So they both stood there, avoiding each other's eyes.

By the time he thought of a soothing word, she was already gone. He went to bed very late, and when he woke coughing in the middle of the night, he let himself believe it was merely his guilt manifesting itself.


	7. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Bleach, Chad would be naked. Often.

* * *

Seventeen years, four months and five days.

Juushirou was good at keeping time. He always had been. Particularly when he felt it was urgent to do so.

Urahara Kisuke was sitting on a bomb.

So Juushirou Ukitake watched and waited. And kept his silence. Here was another secret he and Yoruichi shared. Made all the easier to keep because after the night they both became aware of the Hou Gyoku, they conveniently forgot about each other. Perhaps it was easier for him to mark time because that terrible night coincided with the last time he laid eyes on Traveler.

For a long time, the loss he felt at losing the cat only sharpened when he saw Kisuke's boon companion, whose laughter sometimes rang hollow and whose eyes would go dim when she looked at Juushirou.. She would still smile at him. She was always polite in conversation. But those hands had not reached for him since. It was only when he stopped missing them that he became aware of all the change that was going on around him.

Aizen Sousuke had chosen a new vice captain. Tall, dark and mostly silent Tousen Kaname followed his captain with the surety of a sighted man, and spoke with the calm optimism of a clairvoyant. He was a fitting counterpart to Sousuke's gentle kindness.

Sweet and compassionate Unohana Retsu took over the fourth. This was what everyone had anticipated; the old Captain had made it clear that he did not intend to waste the rest of his eternity in such a restrictive role; there were others outside of Sereitei in need of care. Retsu was his most cherished, most amiable disciple.

Kuchiki Byakuya, to the disappointment of old Yamamoto, declined year after year to take a captain's seat in the Gotei 13. Others sighed at the sight of him, handsome and noble as he was. It was a waste and everyone knew it. It was whispered he had been Shihouin Yoruichi's student at one time. And the Goddess of Shunpo did not take students.

Save one, informally.

These days she was not seen in public without her diminutive bodyguard. Of course the great Shihouin Yoruichi did not need a bodyguard, but custom dictated the necessity. And tiny Soi Fon, witnessed in action, was nearly as formidable as her mistress, though a tad awkward. Juushirou did not know if Yoruichi was the kind to confide the way women do, but he was certain that he had caught Soi Fon gazing at him with an odd combination of envy and awe in her pretty green eyes. Certainly, when she was sent in the capacity of messenger in the dead of night, he found her to be bashful but very business-like. And it was often.

Yoruichi's messages were meant to ease his worry. They were polite and just informative enough, or so she supposed, to relax his nerves. Juushirou would always answer with thanks and assurance that he was fine. They had mastered talking around the subject. And Urahara still sat on his bomb.

Kisuke was just the same. He was not tired, he laughed freely, and he never spoke of his treasure again. Not to Juushirou anyway. He was too busy making jokes and exploring other theories. His gray eyes were not clouded by any kind of apprehension. This made it easy for Juushirou to forget why he was counting the days.

By the time Juushirou remembered that Kisuke was brilliant and slightly deranged, he was being questioned by Central 46 about the twelfth division captain's extracurricular activities. Seventeen years, four months, and five days later.

The representative, who did not give a name, arrived with the first sharp, cold wind of autumn. She quickly drove Kiyone out and got down to business.

_Do you know him well? _ Yes.

_Do you see him often?_ Yes.

_Who does he socialize with?_ Many of the same people I do. Captains, vice captains. . . it's a pretty long list.

_Has he ever showed you his work?_ No.

_Do you know what he's working on now?_ No.

Only one small lie. Juushirou did not waste time being shocked at his deviance. He instead focused on throwing Central 46 off Kisuke's trail. It was all he could do. "Perhaps you should speak to Urahara-taichou directly. He would be happy to share. He always is."

The representative gave no sign of satisfaction or dissatisfaction. She merely offered her respect and left his presence in no particular hurry. She barely missed being intercepted by Shunsui, who arrived five minutes after her departure, in a state of curiosity.

"Pretty girl," he said. "What did she want with you?"

"She wanted to know about Kisuke."

"What did you tell her?" One of Shunsui's many talents was his ability to go from jovial to serious in less than a second.

"Mostly what she wanted to hear," Juushirou answered, taking a deep breath.

"What _didn't _you tell her?" Shunsui's eyes were serious.

"For some time now, Kisuke's had in his possession an object that can make shinigamis into hollows. And hollows into shinigamis." If Juushirou was going to unload his burden to anyone, it would be Shunsui. First, because Shunsui didn't have a resentful bone in his hairy body. Second, because if Juushirou could be of any help to Kisuke, he would need help himself. But he was unprepared for Shunsui's response.

"The hou gyoku." Shunsui nodded. "Did he tell you himself?"  
"Yes--but how--"

"If you had your ear to the ground as often as I do, you'd know more than that. Did you know that he's working on a way to hide it?" Shunsui's eyes were suddenly grave.

"He told me he was going to destroy it."

"He gave up on that after about seven years. He's been working on a way to hide it."

"Has he found a way?"

"Yes." Shunsui motioned his friend to sit. "This is very bad. The only way to do it is to hide it within a human soul."

"A human soul?" Juushirou's jaw dropped.

"Yes. But that's only part of it." Shunsui scratched his head.

"How do you know all this?"

"That little toady vice captain of his. Kuro--"

"Kurotsuchi Mayuri?"

"That's his name. Creepy little fellow. Anyway, he's got quite a mouth on him. Can't imagine Kisuke would have chosen him if he knew."

Juushirou's blood ran cold. "Has he been talking to anyone else?"

"I've been leaning on him a little. He came to me thinking I could help him. Apparently he took his precious knowledge to Sousuke first and wasn't satisfied with his response. Not the greatest judge of character, that little Mayuri."

"Did you talk to Aizen?" As comforted as Juushirou was by the idea that only Aizen was in on the secret, he could not believe it. Not yet.

"I did. He told me he would do whatever he could to help me keep Kisuke safe, if needed. Although he doubted Kisuke would do anything stupid. But now that you say Central 46 is interested, I'm starting to wonder." Shunsui shook his head. "Look at you. We may be getting worked up over nothing."

Juushirou swallowed. "I'm sorry, Shunsui. I should have told you."

"Did Kisuke ask you not to?" The eighth division captain settled his hands on Juushirou's shoulders.

"Yes."

"There's nothing to be sorry for. We just need to do a little damage control." And then he winked. "Have you talked to the lovely Yoruichi lately?"

"No," Juushirou confessed.

"You'd best send for her. And Kisuke as well. Better to talk to him together. If just one of us tries to, we'll never work this out."

"_They call it an 'intervention' these days, you know," Yoruichi says without smiling._

"_I know," Juushirou replies. "It's unfortunate we didn't have a name for it then. Maybe it would have worked." _

_Yoruichi shakes her head. He smiles at her sheepishly. "Wishful thinking, I know," he sighs._


	8. Chapter 8

**Disclaimer: ** I still don't own Bleach. But I'm dealing with it okay.

* * *

"_I have to confess something," she says._

"_You confronted Kisuke a full three years before the so-called intervention?" Juushirou raises an eyebrow._

"_No. I waited at least four. But that's not what I wanted to tell you," Yoruichi snaps._

_Noting the change in her tone, Juushirou takes a breath and lays his palms flat on the table, as if bracing himself. "Go ahead."_

_She closes her eyes. "I regretted walking away from you," she says. "I was all kinds of guilty and instead of talking to you like I always did, I ran. I knew better, but I ran." When she opens her eyes she finds him gazing at her, a bemused expression on his face. A barely perceptible blush surfaces on her cheeks._

"_Just say you still love me," Juushirou says. "I promise I won't laugh."_

_Her eyes narrow. "Did you think I'd lie about that if asked?"_

"_I did," he says. "Not because you are ashamed of it. But because that was the only way anyone would have been able to get to you. Aside from using Kisuke."_

"_Then you understand," she murmurs._

"_I understand that when it all fell into place I finally realized what a martyr you could be," he says. When he reaches for her hand she hesitates for barely a second before letting him take it._

"_You forgot to say I'm also a complete idiot," she says. _

"_There's no point in telling you that. You already know," he smiles at her sadly. "But then idiocy is contagious. The only one with a clear head back then was Shunsui. And the two of you took care of that."_

Kisuke didn't saunter into the thirteenth division compound until long after dark.

Juushirou and Shunsui almost argued about the meaning of his tardiness in the hours after they had sent for him. Juushirou insisted he would come and was willing to be guided in the right direction by his well-meaning friends. Shunsui was vocally certain he was already beyond help, and the real matter at issue now was how to smooth things over. Neither of them knew how it could be done, if the situation was as bad as they suspected. Both theories went to pieces when Kisuke came in, smiling and guileless as ever. "Is there something urgent going on, gentlemen?" he asked.

Shunsui spoke first. "Kisuke, an alarming rumor has reached my ears. We're you friends here, and you know you can trust us. Please tell us what you've been doing."

"A rumor?" Kisuke's eyes were sparkling. "Can't be much of a rumor if you're riled about it, Kyouraku-san. You've always been able to tell the difference between fact and fiction."

Shunsui smiled back at him. "Then you must understand why I'm concerned."

"I do. I'd like to assure you that I'm not doing anything bad."

"Were you aware that Central 46 probably doesn't share that opinion?" Juushirou broke in.

Kisuke blanched, but only a little. "I am aware of that. I suspected I could never trust Mayuri. But he has talent. That's why he's my second."

"His talents are worthless if he'd betray his captain for no good reason," Shunsui hissed. "I'd rip the little toad limb from limb if I didn't care about dirtying my hands. But Kisuke, if we're to help you in any way here, we need to know what he has on you."

"Aside from Hou Gyoku?"

"Yes," Juushirou said.

"A gigai," Kisuke said simply. "I developed a new gigai to hide it in."

"Gigais are for shinigami," Juushirou said. "They can be tracked."

"Not this one," a new voice said. The three men turned to find Yoruichi at the door. The relief Juushirou felt at the sight of her disspated as he scanned her face. It was hard, colder than he'd ever seen her. Was she angry? At who?

Shunsui's eyes were wide. "Cannot be tracked. . . ? That's completely illegal!"

"Yoruichi, don't," Kisuke said.

"Kisuke, shut up. Please." She looked at Shunsui, then at Juushirou. "I'm sorry," she said and fumbled in her uniform for something.

Kisuke surged to her with an urgency no one had ever witnessed in him. She gasped as he threw his arms around her. "Don't do this, Shihouin. If I'm to be punished for this, let it be only me. I know what I've done. I can face the consequences. I don't want you involved." He kissed her temple.

She pushed him away roughly. "I'm already involved. Loving you makes it impossible not to be. But we love our friends too." She looked again at Juushirou. "We can stop this from spreading to them."

"Wait, Yoruichi." Shunsui stepped toward them, hands held out as if he were talking to a wild beast. "We can't call ourselves his friends without helping him."

Yoruichi let out an exasperated sigh. Her hands were moving again, and this time she clutched a little canister in her right hand. Kisuke stopped it with his own. "Are you sure?" he asked her.

"As sure as I'll ever be." She turned to the other two men. "You need to forget you saw us tonight." Before she could be questioned she turned to Shunsui. A bright light went off, and the look of shock on his face melted away as he wobbled and collapsed. Then she turned to Juushirou.

He shook his head. "Why?" he asked, his voice a hoarse whisper. "After all this time. . ."

The look in her eyes could not be defined. "Because right now we're a liability to you. We love you too much to let you be dragged any further into this." As she touched his face, the flash of light went off and the dark consumed him.

He awoke, groggy and disoriented, to the frantic shaking of Shiba Kaien. His eyes were wild, and his news was horrific. Urahara Kisuke had been arrested. By Shihouin Yoruichi herself.


	9. Chapter 9

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Bleach.

* * *

Kaien had to repeat himself twice before the news fully registered. Kisuke: Arrestee. Yoruichi: Arrestor. Yoruichi arrested Kisuke. 

It made even less sense when he understood it. As Kaien helped Juushirou to his feet, the wave of thoughts that rushed over him made him even dizzier. He could barely focus on the prostrate form of Shunsui still on the floor. How?

Kiyone rushed up with hot tea. Juushirou sipped, sputtered. Kaien was busy trying to rouse the other captain. Sentaro was nowhere in sight and the room—it was spinning—was flooded with sunlight. Where did the moon go? It was just here. He was just here, with Shunsui, waiting. . . for what? And it was dark then.

"I've lost time," Juushirou murmured to himself.

"What was that, Ukitake-taichou?" Kaien looked up from his task, clearly alarmed. "Are you okay?"

"Let Kyouraku-taichou sleep it off," Juushirou said. "Tell me what you know."

"A hell butterfly came here. It said Urahara-taichou had been arrested, but nothing else," Kiyone said. "It was strange. It waited until I reached the stairs this morning. I always thought privileged information was only for captains."

"Who was it from?" Juushirou asked.

"I couldn't tell, sir. I'm sorry," Kiyone said.

Juushirou looked at Kaien. "How do we know Shihouin-san is the one who arrested him?"

Kaien looked at him, almost disdainfully. "She'd never let anyone else take him. Never."

"You're certain of that?" Juushirou swallowed the bile that seemed to be rising in his throat. He was the one who should be certain. "She is military and she does respect the law."

Kaien shook his head. "Those two go farther back than you could imagine. I know they seem close in public, but it's deeper than that. Almost like sometimes they share a mind. She would never leave him unprotected if she though he needed it."

Juushirou blinked as the picture became razor sharp in his head. Yoruichi and Kisuke, sitting together on the vast green lawn. Laughing.

Kisuke and Yoruichi, sitting across from each other, smiling their secret smile at each other.

Yoruichi standing right here, eyes feral but sane, arms at her sides as Kisuke embraces her, kisses—Juushirou shook his head. He never saw that. And he was not seeing green now, not after all this time. He looked at Kiyone. "Stay here with Kyouraku-taichou. Kaien, could you come with me please?"

Kurosaki was waiting for them outside the Keigun compound. No, he wasn't waiting there. He was just leaving. He merely stopped to exchange information. "He's in there, but he's not talking. Not to me, anyway," he said, scratching his stubbly chin.

"He didn't say a word to you?" Juushirou asked.

"Well—he was friendly and all that, but he just didn't talk like normal. You know how he talks and talks. He just answered my questions and that was all," the captain said.

"What did you ask him?" Kaien asked.

Kurosaki rolled his eyes. "I asked him why he was in there, and he told me Yoruichi grounded him. I asked him how long he'd been there, and he told me all his life. It was like pulling teeth."

Juushirou sighed. "Have you seen Shihouin-san?"

"No. That little attack dog of hers ran me out of her office. Feisty little chica, that Soi Fon."

"Is Shihouin-san there?" Kaien asked, eyes narrow.

"I couldn't tell you. But she'd see the two of you, wouldn't she?" Kurosaki's voice was an odd mix of curiosity and concern.

"I don't know. Thank you, Kurosaki-taichou," Juushirou said as he moved forward toward the place he was certain his questions would be answered. And if not answered, buried.

Kaien shuddered. "Taichou, this reminds me of something."

"What?"

"That training day before I finished the academy. That hollow that cornered us—it had no reiatsu. But we all felt it. But none of us said anything to each other because we didn't want anyone to think we were crazy. It was like the air just got heavy, and there it was."

"You never mentioned that before." Juushirou stared at him.

"There was no sense in it then," Kaien said. "I asked the others later on, and by then most of them felt like they'd imagined it. But it was _there_. Moving in the shadows, planning its next movement based on ours. That's what this feels like. Is there something going on?"

Juushirou looked at Kaien. Hard. And knew in a split second he did not want to be the one to destroy the marble gods that Kisuke and Yoruichi seemed to be. "I don't know, Kaien. We'll see."

Urahara Kisuke was not being held in a jail cell. Just a few hundred feet from the entrance there was a good sized room with desk, a futon, and a a very comfortable looking chair. When Juushirou and his vice captain found him, Kisuke was draped across this chair in the most dramatic way possible, half his face hidden by an elaborately drawn fan. It had golden dragons on it and a forest green tassel swung from the bottom. Juushirou noted Kisuke bore a striking resemblance to a bored debutante. Aloud.

"Ah, well," Kisuke drawled, "we can't all be pretty. Your hair is untidy today, Ukitake-san. Did you just wake up?" His eyes sparkled with something that could be spite or amusement.

Juushirou began to pace as Kaien took a seat on the futon. "Kisuke-kun, what is this?"

"It looks a lot to me like the captain of the thirteenth squad on a social call," Kisuke chirped.

"Have you lost your mind?"

"Ukitake-taichou! Please be calm. You're turning red," Kisuke responded.

"Why shouldn't I? I wake up to the news you've been arrested. Am I supposed to celebrate?" Juushirou was as close to roaring than he'd ever been. "What is the meaning of this? Tell me what you know!"

"I was tried last night. Yoruichi took me to Central 46. She called in every favor she was owed to bring me back here. Then she told me to sit tight and collect my wits since apparently I've been without them for years. And then you people come in—Aizen, Kurosaki, even Mayuri—interrupting my peaceful meditation." Kisuke's eyes narrowed. "This is all because you never screwed her, you know. That would have been enough to separate our hearts and she would've had the power to just let me go."

As Juushirou felt his face go crimson he noted a choking sound coming from the futon. He 'd have to deal with that later. "Are you finished, boy?"

Kisuke took a breath. The fan tipped a little, exposing a wide grin. "I was finished the day I created Hou Gyoku. I was too selfish to use it on myself. But I didn't realize it until I was standing in front of it and knew I didn't have a soul to use it on. And the gigai that finally got me caught? Too much time in it will make a shinigami a human being, you know that? That's why it's just another abomination." He laughed and it would have been a harsh, hollow sound if there wasn't a distinct ring of mischief under it. Even now, there was not an ounce of regret in him. "Meditation works wonders in times like this, I think."

Juushirou shook his head. "Did—did Shihouin-san plead for your life?"

"She did. They are deliberating as we speak. We'll know when they come for me if I'm to die by Soukyoku," Kisuke said. "Don't look like that. I told you I was willing to face the consequences."

"I'm not," Juushirou said. "I'm sure Yoruichi isn't either."

Kisuke merely smiled again and refused speak anymore until Juushirou, frustrated, prepared to leave.

"It's not up to you, Juu-chan," he said, giving him a brief hug. Then he kissed him lightly on each cheek dramatically, stopping at the left ear to whisper, "It's not up to her, either."

_Her eyes are serious now. "He said that?"_

"_Said what?"_

_Her nostrils flare. "About the screwing."_

"_That _was_ crude," Juushirou says. "Was it true?" _

_Yoruichi sighs and rubs her neck. "I don't think it would have been so crude if he was only joking," she says. "He knew me well enough to know we weren't being honest about each other. It's absurd now to think I believed I could hide it from him."_

"_Was he jealous?" he asks her._

"_No. Just irritated at not being in on it. That's what Kisuke is. He's always wanted to be at the center of things. But his temper is awful."_

"_Did he make you suffer?"_

"_Only as much as I let him. He was a complete ass when I took him to Central 46 to see if something could be worked out. I had faith in the system. He's always known better and felt the need to rub my face in it." She chuckles a little. "I deserved that for not listening to him when he needed me to."_

"_So in the end he was sentenced to death?" Juushirou asks._

"_He was."  
"Is that where you were that day?"_

"_Yes. When they announced their verdict, it felt like my heart was being ripped out and danced on."_

"_That's when you decided, isn't it." Juushirou doesn't need to hear anything else. _

_But she keeps going. "He never told me that Aizen was one of his visitors."_

"_He probably thought nothing of it," Juushirou says reassuringly._

_Yoruichi shakes her head. "Believe me, he did. He just didn't bother to mention it."_


	10. Chapter 10

**Disclaimer:**I do not own Bleach.

* * *

_Juushirou isn't sure he heard her correctly. "You're saying--"_

"_Yes. Kisuke knew when he sent those children here there was more at stake than the life of Kuchiki Rukia. Not just because her soul hosted Hou Gyoku. But because it was clear to both of us when Kuchiki Byakuya was sent to retrieve her something wasn't right. He wouldn't have gone himself. Not without being ordered. And who could order Byakuya-bo besides Central 46?"_

_Juushirou takes a breath. "And why would Central 46 concern itself with such a minor crime committed by someone less than a seated officer."_

_Yoruichi nods._

"_What did he tell you?"_

"_Only that he got lucky and found a shinigami to use the gigai and hide Hou Gyoku. I knew that was a lie when he told me. He'd had plenty of chances. But something about Kuchiki Rukia appealed to him. I still don't know what. The only thing he told me for certain was that if Soul Society came looking for her, it would confirm his theory. He never bothered to tell me what the theory was, but considering he'd gone through the trouble of awakening Ichigo and having me train Sado and Inoue, I knew I needed to come with them, just in case his worst-case-scenario came true." She shakes her head. "I would never have believed it was Aizen Sousuke." _

"_Nor would I," Juushirou says. "But that's not what's bothering me now."_

_She regards him cautiously. She remembers him well enough to know this question has been in his mind since the last time he saw her. "Say it, Juu-chan."_

"_Why didn't you say goodbye?"_

_She gapes at him long enough for him to become uncomfortable. He stares at the table and stammers, "What?"_

"_I. . . I thought you were going to ask something else."_

When Juushirou and Kaien returned to the thirteenth division compound, the sun was high and Ise Nanao was standing on the porch looking on sourly as Shunsui shuffled out of Juushirou's living quarters, flinching at the sun. By the time they reached him, they heard him groan an irritated response to the fuming of his vice captain, "Not so loud, Nanao-chan, not so loud."

"You should have thought of that while you were downing the sake last night, taichou," snapped Nanao-can.

Kiyone was standing in the doorway with an unabashed grin on her face. So. She had been the one to unleash the Wrath of Nanao. Clever girl, that Kiyone, if a tad vindictive.

By now Juushirou was face-to-face with the slightly green Shunsui. "Must have been a fun night," Shunsui said in passing.

"Oh, it was," Juushirou lied. Of course it couldn't have been. Neither of them had _ever _partied so hard they didn't remember it in the morning. But what Shunsui could not remember also could not hurt him. If he knew the situation, he would be insisting to stay. Juushirou thought it better to carry his heartache alone for as long as he could. "Get some rest, Shun. I'll come to see you later."

He watched the pair disappear over the hill that sheltered the eighth division compound before he went inside. He instructed Kaien and Kiyone to leave him alone and escaped to his chamber. There he could think without interruption. Good, fun-loving Shunsui, who had no doubt where he loved, no sympathies where he hated, and had no hesitation when faced with the very nature of right and wrong. So very opposite to Juushirou. He knew he had no time to ponder his failings, as many as they were.

But he also had no right to interfere any further—or at all. Kisuke was no child. And Yoruichi—no, that door had closed long ago. Neither his wife, his lover, nor his responsibility, that one. He knew her mind, even though he thought he had forgotten it. It was like Yamamoto-sama taught him, all those years ago.

One of his last training sessions at the academy. Yamamoto-sama had singled him out, and Shunsui as well, because he felt they were gifted. They would wander the hills farther west of Rukongai, breathing the air and feeling the wind on their backs, listening. That day, Yamamoto instructed Shunsui to stand and watch. Juushirou he blindfolded. "The thing we share with other other creature, including hollow-kind, is instinct," he said. "When to fight, when to flee, when to hold. To hold is the hardest thing to master. It is the ability not only _not_ to act, but to use your perception to detect and divert the inertia of another. I can rush at you, and I can strike you, but it is harder to strike you when you stand fast and move quickly to dodge. The difference is that the enemy's mind is often in chaos during a battle. It is stripped bare. You must learn to direct your instinct so that it is no longer your master. And," he added, moving away from Juushirou and leaving him in his darkness, "you must learn to detect by his movement whether the mind of your enemy is chaos or order."

Beneath the blindfold, Juushirou had closed his eyes. Red. He was facing the sun. The breeze caressed his ears. This was old stuff, he conceded. Being able to see without the benefit of sight was something any shinigami worth his salt masted in his first year. But--

He felt the pounding of earth beneath his feet. Someone was rushing at him. Who was it? They were coming from behind and although the movements were quick they were measured, almost calculated. But only almost. Whoever it was had fear in his heart. There it was. As the person's soul cutter came down towards his back, Juushirou turned, pulled his own, and deflected it. There was no other blow. Why not? Juushirou waited for it for what seemed like an eternity. But it did not come.

What did come was the blow from the opposite direction. He could hear the air splitting. He stepped to the side.

The heavy breathing he heard next was his own. A little slower and he would have lost his left arm. He ripped off the blindfold. "Why--"

Yamamoto stood staring at him, directly ahead. This was the second attacker. "Very good, very good, Ukitake-kun. But tell me this. Why did you not press the first attacker?"

Shunsui, behind him, face ashen, could only stare.

"I didn't want to fight. I was waiting for him to come back at me before I acted," Juushirou said.

"Were you assuming he did not want to fight you?" Yamamoto asked.

"I know he did. Because you told him to. Otherwise he would never have come at me."

"But what else?"

"His movement was slow. He wanted to fight without hurting me. And--" Juushirou's eyes widened. "He didn't know how do that. Not without making it look like he wasn't trying. His mind was in chaos."

"So you held. You did not realize Kyouraku-kun's dilemma until now, did you?"

"No, sensei, I did not." Juushirou paused. "And I don't need to know why that is, do I?"

"No, you do not. Because you know you can trust your instincts," Yamamoto-sama said.

_Well_, Juushirou thought wryly in the comfort of his chamber, _this wouldn't be the first time Yamamoto-sama was wrong about something._ But the instinct to hold was screaming in him. Either Kisuke would get his wish for punishment or Yoruichi would find some way to stop it. To act before he knew which one wold happen would be nothing short of foolhardy and selfish, but—he didn't trust their instincts any more than he trusted his own. But it was late now and the moon was up.

Juushirou sighed and tried to sleep.


	11. Chapter 11

**Disclaimer:** Now and forever, they exist for us because of Kubo. We totally owe him.

* * *

He tried, but he did not succeed. Not quite. Hours of laying very still and he had only reached that limbo, that hazy place where his blood roared in his ears and the darkness had to fight the encroaching light. For those long years after the knowledge of Hou Gyoku, it was here that he would meet her. She would lay close to him and touch his hair, his chest, his body. She never said a word, but her eyes were always lit with conversations they should still be having. And some they never had at all. But in the end she would always go, excusing herself by brushing her lips to his forehead. 

This time, however, those lips settled on his own and he could not see her at all, only hear her shallow breath and feel her hands gripping his shoulders almost possessively. And he heard it. "I won't say it. I won't leave my heart behind and take yours with me. I won't wrong you that way, Juu-chan. Hate me if you wish. I would never begrudge you that."

By the time he understood that he was not dreaming, it was already over. He sat up. The door was open just a crack, and next to it there was a large, wooden shield. The markings on it identified it as something that was not his. He got out of bed to examine it more closely. Wood hard and smooth, the Shihouin insignia burned into the center. A thing he had now to remind himself of her and, by that route, Kisuke. A keepsake. A memento. He could hear the alarm bells now. The pieces fell together and his whole body went numb. Juushirou ran his hand along the edge of the shield. "Goodbye," he murmured to himself.

When Kiyone came to confirm the alert, he sent her away and asked to be left alone. For the entire day his wish was obeyed. He sat in cold silence, looking toward a future without them, dreading its emptiness. What was he before then? He could barely remember. It was unfathomable that anything should return to the way it was before. At least before they had interrupted him, there was color in the world, no matter how dull, and the sure sense of safety. Now there was nothing but harsh gray doubt. He had failed at something. He had not even called out after her.

He dragged himself to his feet sometime after dusk, slid his door open and came face to face with Shunsui. The brown eyes were sympathetic but not pitying. If Juushirou were the kind to give in to tears, it would have been at this point. Instead he took a deep breath, looked his friend in the eyes, and said, "She left me something. Come and look at this."

Shunsui nodded and followed him back into the room. Juushirou closed and carefully locked the door as he knelt to examine the crest. "Do you remember learning about this at the academy? I never thought I'd see it up close," Shunsui mused. "One of the oldest objects in Soul Society, capable of destroying the Soukyoku." He paused. "She loves you."

"She left me," Juushirou said.

"Do you think she'll never come back? Only Kisuke has been banished. Aizen convinced someone at Central 46 they weren't worth pursuing. They're still alive. Doesn't that mean anything?"

"She'll stay away for his sake, and I don't blame her. The chance—the _chances_—I've had to keep her here, I've wasted."

Shunsui rose to his feet. "Do you believe they'll never come back?" His head tilted in a way that suggested that he already knew the answer, he just needed to hear Juushirou say it aloud.

Juushirou stared at him, caught between annoyance and gratitude. His mind was clear and his instincts sharp again. Kisuke, at his core, was a servant of the world he imagined Soul Society could be. Yoruichi was a servant of Soul Society who made no distinction between what was, what is, what could be. Juushirou knew this better than anyone. He had heard it from them, in their own feral, reverent words. He had seen it in their wild but somehow calculated actions. "Until they do, we should seal this." _I'll wait forever if necessary_, his eyes said.

Shunsui smiled. "So we should." _I'll wait with you, friend_, his heart answered back.

In the way they did many years ago as callow Academy students beset with a task, they went to work.

* * *

"Ironic, isn't it." It's more of a statement than a question. "I never thought that thing had any practical use," Yoruichi says. 

"So why was it that, of all things, that you left me?" he asks.

She shrugs. "It was the only thing I had of value to give you. My whole life I had been told it was the most precious Shihouin heirloom. I am the last of the Shihouin. I didn't want to take it with me. I thought maybe you would want it."

"I would rather--" he begins, but stops.

"Have had me?" Her lips are twisting, half a sneer, half a grin. "I require more maintenance. It would have been troublesome."

"It doesn't matter how I felt then," Juushirou says, blushing. "Talking about it won't change anything."

"I know. I just remembered how enjoyable it is to tease you."

He smiles back at her. "You want me to say you haven't changed. You know you have."

"How so?" She crosses her arms.

"Why didn't you come to me when you got here? That's where the difference is. Shihouin Yoruichi, former commander of the Keigun brigade, was afraid to face a sickly old captain. It was written all over your face before you took off with the boy."

"I was a little shocked to see you there," she says ruefully. "Byakuya-bo is one thing. You are completely another. But you always did take care of your people. I should not have been surprised to find you at Rukia's holding place." She opens her mouth to say something else, catches his eye again, and quiets.

"How is Kisuke?" Juushirou asks softly.

She smiles to herself. "Free to experiment unfettered," she says. "We wandered for years after we left. He managed to settle down, but I never could. Once we argued and I left him. Didn't go back for at least ten years. I hated that he hadn't left anything behind, you know? I was jealous of him for a long time."

"And now?" he asks.

"No point in it. We finally have separate souls. Not too far apart, but separate. It was hard, but it's for the best."

"What will you do when you return to the living world?"

"Gather our resources and do all we can to help with the Aizen problem," Yoruichi says without a moment's pause. Then looks at him in shock when Juushirou begins to laugh.

"Shunsui called you both heroes," he says. "He always knows."

"And just what else did the all-knowing Shunsui say?"

"That I'd better take you home before you leave me again," he said, still laughing.

"What's so funny about that?" She leans forward.

He leans forward too, close enough to touch. When he kisses her, it's a short one. "He's wrong about that one. I won't take you home with me."

She slams her hands on the table. "You haven't changed a bit, you old tease."

Juushirou smiles at her wickedly. "When I take you home, it's going to be for good." Then the smile falls away. "I won't say goodbye to you again."

"I never said it in the first place," she scowls at him.

"Right," he says. "Just as long as we're on the same page."

She doesn't hesitate, not for a second. "Same paragraph, same sentence."

"Same word?" he asks hopefully.

She smiles at him. "I'll catch up. I never thought I'd come back to find you ahead of me," she says, and the warmth in her eyes is enough to make him concede again she's worth waiting for. A little while longer, at least.

* * *

**A/N:** Where did they wander? What did they do? And just what changed Kisuke's mind? I'll tell you later. Thanks for reading.  



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